New Age Dating Advice:
Are You Sabotaging Your Online Dating Success?
By: Chonticha Marijne
If, like thousands before you, you have ventured into cyberspace to find your ideal partner and you haven’t been very successful in even getting a date, let alone in finding your soul mate, then it’s high time to evaluate your online dating approach. Online dating is just another form of communicating, and not everyone is a good communicator. What’s obvious to some, may come as a complete surprise to others. Let’s take a look at 10 tips on how to increase your success rate.
One of the advantages of online dating can at the same time be a total disadvantage. There are literally thousands of profiles on the web of possible candidates to choose from. That’s great! Or is it? Put yourself in the shoes of the searcher – what would you do if you were confronted by so many choices? That’s right, you’d narrow down the search, wouldn’t you? The first thing that you would do, is to ignore all the profiles that do not include a photograph.
Tip #1: Always upload your photograph! Make it a recent one, where at least 3/4 of your face can be seen clearly. Don’t use one of you taken on Halloween, in your costume of choice, or wearing a hat or cap of any kind. A nice, candid photo on which you are smiling naturally works best.
Tip #2: Unless you want to attract the wrong guy or gal, for the wrong reasons, then select an appropriate username. Keep it neutral, funny is okay, but stay away from cheap and suggestive. If you’re wondering what influence something as innocuous as a user name could possibly have, then chances are that you’re using one that’s limiting your success.
Tip #3: Writing may not be your strong point, but it’s no excuse to post a low-quality profile. Don’t come across as timid (no one wants to date a wimp), or tell people your entire life story (boring), or give too little information (you’ll be ignored), or be too slick or coy or use only cliches. You’re interesting, so be interesting! Learn from other people’s profiles – browse through them and see what catches your attention and what turns you off and make use of that information. Don’t be afraid to ask someone you trust for their honest opinion.
Tip #4: Be honest and sincere. If you write insincerely, trust me, it will show. If you lie, keep in mind that you will require an excellent memory to keep track of your untruths. Rest assured that dishonesty will turn around and bite you when you finally do meet the love of your life.
Tip #5: Use correct grammar, punctuation and spelling in your profile. There’s nothing more off-putting than reading a description that looks as if it was written by a six-year-old (unless you are a six-year-old). If in doubt, have someone you trust proofread it for you.
Tip #6: Describe the type of person that you’re looking for. On some sites it’s a matter of ticking a number of boxes, whereas on other sites you’re able to write your own description. Either way, make sure that you’re communicating your requirements, otherwise you’ll attract people you don’t want or you won’t attract anyone at all because you seem terribly desperate.
Tip #7: If at first you don’t succeed… make changes to your profile text. If your description is not getting you the results you want, make some adjustments and see how they work out. Expecting different results by doing exactly the same doesn’t make sense, now does it?
Tip #8: Don’t be a wallflower. You were pro active enough to register on an online dating website, so remain pro active and step out of your comfort zone to contact other members to express your interest. You’ll gain confidence as you go along, and although you won’t always get a positive response, it’s all online – you can move on to the next person at the click of a mouse.
Tip #9: If you’re on an online dating website that really appeals to you, consider upgrading your membership. On some sites you can post your profile for free, but in order to benefit from all the features that a good online dating website has, you need to pay a fee. Free memberships generally offer very limited privileges and paying for the use of a good site can significantly increase the quality of your online dating experience.
Tip #10: Log in to your site regularly. It’s no use going to the trouble of joining an online dating website, optimizing your profile and then not taking any further action.
There you are – 10 simple rules to significantly improve your chances for a successful and enjoyable online dating experience. Effective online dating requires stepping out of your comfort zone and taking action. Don’t wait for your soul mate to drop into your arms by chance – speed up to process and go online to find him or her. W. Clement Stone once said, “Aim for the moon. If you miss, you may hit a star”. I hope you find your star, if not your moon!
About the Author:
Chonticha Marijne enjoys writing about the challenges and dynamics of online dating. For more quality content and resources, visit her blog at . This article is copyright Â© 2006 by Chonticha Marijne and may be reprinted in its entirety as long as both byline and copyright statement are included.